My Special Friend Jack (A Little Parody)

I am very lucky to have a special friend. His name is Jack. Just Jack. He is quite unusual. For example, he is invisible. Which shows how powerful he is, I think. He can also communicate with me without saying a word, he is so clever. He sticks around (I can almost always feel when he is near) to watch over me and protect me from harm and temptation. And if I ever need anything or want anything, all I have to do is ask Jack. And if Jack approves, he makes sure I get it. Of course, if I ask him for something that wouldn't be good for me, he doesn't let me have it. So I can depend on him to do the best for me.

Jack was also a friend of my dad's, which is how I came to know him. Dad told me all about him. Dad said that long ago Jack was not invisible, but just like you and me. But then he died (or - and this is the best part - he PRETENDED to die) and his body disappeared, but he just kept right on being alive, so that he could help people like me and my dad.

My friends kid me sometimes about how much I admire Jack and depend on him. And sometimes I think maybe they're right. But then Jack reminds me real quick that I had better not piss him off. Nothing really bad, of course - he makes me bang my finger with a hammer, or makes me get stuck in traffic so I'm late for work. Boy, does that bring me back quick to my senses! I've learned never ever to doubt Jack. He is one powerful dude!

Some of my friends are nicer, and ask me to introduce them to Jack, so that Jack can help them, too. I tell them it's real easy. All you have to do is be ready to notice when Jack shows up. You won't see him, you won't hear him, but you'll know when he's there. And then you just have to do whatever you think Jack would want you to do, because if you do something he doesn't like, he'll dump you.

I'm pretty sure that Jack is so great that when any of his friends are about to die, Jack won't let them. He'll show them how to do exactly what he did: keep right on being alive, even though the body is gone. In fact, I asked Jack about that, and I just had such a wonderful thrill go through my body that I know it was Jack, telling me, "That's right!"

I can't believe how lucky I am, that I got to know Jack.